Hi, I’m Jungle Mom. I live in a jungle on the side of a volcano in the middle of the Pacific ocean, with Jungle Twins, Jungle Husband, Jungle Cat, and a fascinating collection of uninvited arthropods. Which island? I’m not going to tell you, but I will tell you this- Hemingway once visited here. He called it a stinking dung heap and said he couldn’t wait to leave. There are days when I echo this sentiment, but mostly I would describe the island as lush, green, fragrant, beautiful, broken down, annoying, inspiring, challenging, wild, and mysterious.
Jungle Twins (pet-named Mumu and Lulu) were born on Valentines Day, 2008. They are pretty darn new to this world, and pretty darn cute. It blows my mind to think that this jungle is all they’ve ever known. I was raised in a different jungle; most people call it New England. My jungle was full of snow and red falling leaves, bitter cold and hot apple cider and people who say “wicked” a lot. I used to say “wicked” a lot, and also “jesum crow!” but these phrases were weeded out of me at 19 when I moved from New England to old England because in old England no one could understand what I was “on about.”
I met Jungle Dad in old England. He likes to say he wooed me with his designer T-shirt collection, and by designer he means Fruit of the Loom. JD had a black tee, a white tee and a red tee all emblazoned with the Fruit of the Loom logo, that he used to wear in rotation. They were the pride of his college wardrobe. I started hiding them early on in the relationship and made him shop at H&M, where the other cool London students shopped. He found cooler T-shirts to enhance his wardrobe and lure him away from the FOTL tees, but still ended up cutting the FOTLs to shreds with a pair of scissors one day because “the impulse to wear them again was too great.” It was probably for the best. .
Mumu and Lulu are peacefully sleeping in the next room. They are the cutest jungle babies you ever saw, and growing so fast. Soon they will be swinging from vines. They’ll be scientists like their Daddy and build radios out of coconuts like little jungle baby MacGyvers. But for now, they’ll just sleep.
* Update: Jungle Mom has left the jungle; she now resides in Massachusetts.


Forgot to mention I grew up in New England and busted a gut about “jesum crow” ~ I had to completely strike it from my vocabulary because every time it ever came out of my mouth people thought I was an alien. I began to think my family made it up!
My twins were due February 14th!
And I live in Africa – although a very civilised South Africa, with 18 month old twins and a 4 year old.